Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Lemons and Limes

Erin gave me some dynamite advice last week on how to make our kitchen look bigger: We now keep all small appliances and cooking utensils in the basement. This, I thought, was a terrific idea. Where I used to crowd the coffee maker, toaster oven, and a carafe of spatulas and wooden spoons, I now display a glass bowl filled with lemons and limes.

I’m not kidding; it’s very Martha.

Now, if I want to toast a bagel or make some coffee, all I have to do is put the baby someplace where he’s prevented from licking outlets or eating flotsam from the floor, race down the basement steps to the soundtrack of the screaming, confined child; lift the needed appliance from the table that we stashed down there in order to make our porch look bigger, and return breathless to the kitchen after rescuing Shef, who is obviously and massively spoiled.

I’d be extraordinarily crabby about this situation if I hadn’t gotten the news this morning that I’ll be gainfully employed next year teaching tenth grade English, so I can buy coffee on the way to work instead of hustling up and down the basement stairs to make it.

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