Sunday, June 29, 2014

EQ21: Statue of Liberty < RSVP

A bunch of 90s classics are now on Netflix including one of my all-time favorites, Clueless. This movie earns an absolute five stars.

"Josh, I so need lessons from you on how to be cool.  Can you tell me that part about Kenny G again?"

Do you even remember how awesome this movie is?! It's Paul Rudd!

If you don't actually remember every word, you should go to Netflix and watch this film  It's so worth it.  Watching it is almost enough to make me forget about my scalp psoriasis.

EQ20: RH=51.3 %

This equation has something to do with humidity.  It's been sticky here, and I feel like I'm retaining water.

In other news. the FitBit obsession continues. I signed up for a trail half marathon in order to force myself to train and earn steps.  I'm going to be the fittest 6th grade teacher in the entire metro area because I can't bear to lose a stupid workplace step challenge.

I think something might be wrong with me.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

EQ19: Psoriasis < Some Other Chronic Conditions

I think this is equation represents an unequivocal truth.  Psoriasis, while annoying and ugly, is definitely better and less troublesome and scary that some other chronic conditions.  For instance, Cancer.

Still, I hate my psoriasis.

Did I say before that my doctor says I don't need the lights anymore?  I can just go outside in the sun?  But, it's hard to find times to just recline outside in a bikini.  I did it today, though. I tried to do my meditation at the same time.  I tried to just note the problems I was having with it, per Andy's  suggestion.

That's heat, I noted.

That's a fly landing on my leg, I noted.

That's discomfort, I noted.

This is nudity in the backyard, I noted.

Still, I did the whole 20 minutes.  I'm itchy all over and I'm hoping some of my lesions will burn off.

Damn psoriasis.

Monday, June 23, 2014

EQ18: 3-4 cun < to BL39

This is an equation about how to release tension due to tendonitis and plantar fasciitis, both of which have plagued me.  Apparently, it's for accupuncturists or accupressurists. 

Now I have a tendonitis on my left knee.  A year ago, I had it on my right knee.  My personal physical therapist (SIL Steph) prescribed friction massage.  Let me describe it: you press the painful area as hard as you can, so that you're almost screaming.  Or, you have a partner do it for you. You do this for a couple of minutes, and then you do it again. Finally, you ice.

If you Google about friction massage, the articles will probably tell you that you shouldn't be screaming in pain from the technique, but my personal philosophy is "More Pain; More Gain."

Sunday, June 22, 2014

EQ17: CC = AA

After today's baseball foray, we headed to Noodles for some nosh.  (I actually don't like the word "nosh." Especially don't like "noshing."  Just trying it out here to make sure.)

Anyway, we sat next to an older white hetero couple who looked as if they'd just been at church.  Go God!

When they were finished eating, the man approached our table.  "Excuse me," he said.  "I just wanted to say that you look like such a nice, clean-cut family."

"Well, thank you," we smiled.

"His hair is nice and short," he said, pointing at Shef, "and you don't have any tattoos. That I can see, anyway."

I wondered at this point if Dan planned to show him his two tatts, but he didn't.

"You just look so very nice," he said, gesturing at the baseball hats and making a nice comment about Mac that I can't recall.

"We're All-American!" I proclaimed.

He smiled and walked away.  The guy seemed nice, but I was bothered by the idea that I couldn't be a good, nice mom if I weren't white, sporty, and piercing-free.  We couldn't be All-American if we weren't "Clean Cut," in this guy's estimation.

"Wow," I said to Dan.  "We just got mistaken for republicans."

"I was totally thinking that," he said.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

EQ16: ED = BD

Every Day = Baseball Day

Have you or yours played traveling ball?  If so, then you know.  Baseball is our life.

Shef's game this morning was a loss.  I was impressed by the way the Millers fought back from a deficit and only lost by 1.  The Millers gave it their all.  The umpire, on the other hand, did not.  Dude really couldn't officiate.  One time he gave a kid 4 strikes.  Another time he gave a kid 2.  One time he said that a tag isn't a tag if you do it "high."  I think the ump himself might have been high.  

I hate to say this, but the Millers lost the game because of the terrible officiating.  It chapped my hide,  but I had to be a model of grace and sportwomanship.  Therefore, I only said "asshole" one time. 

Go team!  Let's get 'em this afternoon!

Thursday, June 19, 2014

EQ15: B + B = B + B

So hey!  I live with three boys and their balls.  You've never heard as many ball jokes as we have over here.

"Can I share that ball?"

"Let me have one of your balls!"

"Grab that ball!"


Yeah, it's always that funny.  I never thought I myself would tire of ball jokes, but dudes, I'm TIRED OF THE BALLS.

It's probably going to be a long summer with the Boys + their Balls, which equal the Boys and their Balls.

Summer = A-OK

Status Update:

FitBit Day One: 24, 023 steps.  I obviously rock.

New Year's Resolution: 26 of 52 books read. Faves so far: A Tale for the Time Being, Americanah, Unbroken, We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves,  The Rosie Project, The Invention of Wings and Hyperbole and a Half.

Baseball: Parents on our side of the field got scolded and then threatened by the ump last night.  To be honest, Ump made some bad calls. A few parents made some helpful remarks about the actual rules of baseball.  Since I don't know the actual rules of baseball, it wasn't me.

Violin: Sticker on the Vivaldi third movement! Huzzah!

Dog: Sits on my lap while I type blog entries.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

FitBit = New Obsession

I got a Fit Bit through a work challenge.  I get to have the Fit Bit for free if I average 8000 steps/day for a given time period.  That's going to be no problem, FYI.

I am loving the Fit Bit.  It looks like this:

I connected it an app on my phone that tracks every flipping thing.  I got it at noon today, and I've probably looked at the app 10 times.  I can't see this getting better.  I'm probably going to be obsessed with the Fit Bit and the Fit Bit app. 

Expect regular Fit Bit updates. At least it's better than talking about my psoriasis.

Monday, June 16, 2014

EQ12: LTP = Totally Under Control

I'm working two days this week.  I'm going to say that this feels like a BFD.  WORKING?! In the second week of SUMMER?!  I just don't want to do it, ttytt.

But, I got over my initial reticence and showed up to work on Laptop Policies.  We're getting 1:1 devices, and we're having policies.

Don't even worry about it because the policies are going to be GR8.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

EQ11: 1D = 2D

Just back from one of three stints of work at our beloved Camp.  This time, I was training the staff on their written communication requirements.  As you can imagine, this is no one's favorite camp responsibility.  As my boss put it in her last email to me: "Let me know what I can do to help to prepare for the highlight of any counselor's experience - paperwork!"

Picking up on your sarcasm there, Marie.

In any case, Camp = Bomb because they pay me on a wicked good barter system.  One Day of work from me = 2 Days of camp for Shef.  Hard to argue with that favorable equation.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

EQ10: M ≠ C

I realized in my last post that it sounds like I'm controlling Mac's reading choices.  You guys, I am so not.  Mom is not (always) Controlling.  My own mom let me read whatever I wanted whenever I wanted to, and I've always valued and admired this parenting choice.

So, I also let the children read whatever and whenever they want.  It can be problematic, let me tell you; but censorship is also problematic.

The issue with Mac and the chapter books is that he actually can't decode and comprehend the books on his own. This doesn't always stop him.  Kid powers through those pages sounding out the words and using the pictures to build the meaning.  But wouldn't it be more fun to read AND understand?

Under the assumption that the answer to this question is YES, I checked out five easy readers and dropped them in his library bag.

Every night, he takes the easy readers out of the library bag and puts them on my bed.

"Stop putting your books in here," he told me.

Makes me laugh so hard.

Early literacy peeps, what should I do in this situation?  Follow the child into the A to Z mysteries?

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

EQ9: Mac = 6

I'm not sure how to break this to you, except to just say that Mac is going to be 6 years old tomorrow.  It's his birthday, and he's going to be SIX.

Tonight, on the eve of this 6th birthday, we read a book together called Amelia Bedelia Sleeps Over.  I hastily checked this out of the library Easy Reader section for summer reading.  Mac, himself tirelessly ambitious, checked out 2nd grade chapter books.

Amelia Bedelia is more his speed, and he seemed to enjoy it while reading.  But, when I asked him for his star rating at it's conclusion (Kid has a Goodreads account for summer.  Friend him.) he said, "Zero."

"Zero?" I said.

"Yeah," he said.  "Way too girly."

Sunday, June 8, 2014

EQ8: A +/- Cr = S

I do love change, but sometimes the shift from School to Unstructured Time causes some disequilibrium.  To put it simply, Adjustment plus-or-minus Crankiness equals Summer.

This year, I'm trying to combat the potential unpleasantness with gobs of sleep.  Yesterday, I stayed in bed until 10.  Today, I stayed there until 9.  So far, this plan has yielded pleasant results.  I emerge ready to make decisions in a timely and reasonable way.

Today, I've decided to force my family to do yard work with me.  After some Adjustment and Crankiness, I'm sure the results will be Sublime.

Thursday, June 5, 2014

EQ7: J = Obvi

Apparently, my Joy was totally Obvious this morning.  I stopped at Starbucks on the way to school (staff meeting and retirement luncheon), and the cashier said, "You must be a school teacher."

"I AM a school teacher," I said, incredulous.

"I can tell just by looking at you," he continued.  I looked down at my outfit to see which part gave me away.

"It's just that you look so happy," he explained.

"It's the first day without kids," I admitted.  "I am really, really happy."

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

EQ6: 64C=Ex2

64 Comments = Exhausted times 2

I finished my narrative comments.  I actually had fewer to write this year because of my team teaching gig with intrepid partner, KK.  15 fewer.  But, still the effort exhausted me.  When I finished in my classroom at about 2:30, I jumped all over the room doing a little dance while singing, "BOOM! Shakalakalaka! BOOM! Shakalakalaka!"

I was flying super high until I got home, realized I could no longer stand, fed Mac chips and cheese for dinner, and collapsed on the couch for an hour while he watched sub-par television.

Now it's just graduation, a retirement party, two four-hour staff meetings, and a mandatory picnic.

And then, #summerfun.

Sunday, June 1, 2014

EQ5: Honesty = Best Policy

Yesterday, my friend Melanie mentioned in passing that a handyperson would be doing some work on her bathroom.

"Oh!" I said.  "Can I get his contact information?  I have some projects I need help with."

"Well," Melanie said, frowning, "you caaannn...."

"Is he, like, really expensive?" I asked.

"It's not that," she said, still frowning.  "It's that he's really...."

"Yes?" I prompted.

Her eyes narrowed a bit.  The suspense was killing me. 

"He's really... gruff.  And brusque.  And, he's actually really pushy.  And I just don't feel comfortable being around him."

"Okay!" I said, laughing.  "That's quite a recommendation!"

"So, you can have his number.  He is really good!"

"That's okay!" I said.  "I think I'll go in another direction."