Friday, August 31, 2012

Stop. Hatin's Bad.

Went to a fabulous wedding tonight. One of my colleagues. The couple wrote their own vows. Halfway through hers the bride said, "I forgot the rest, so I'm just going to make it up." I loved that so much.

Later, I tore up the dance floor with several girl pals. My spouse and the other men chose not to join us in our the wild limb flailing.

On the way home we talked about what a bummer it is that Pronto is such a bad dog. I think something actually has to be done.

Because he's really a bad dog.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Birds Fly

Finally we arrive at the day I've been dreaming of: the day that Mac, Shef, and I all go to school at the same place. No longer will I have to drive all over creation to pick them up by five o'clock.

I'm skipping my morning meeting to walk Mac to the classroom, mostly because he slept through his orientation. Like, he was snoring in my arms. When he woke up a half hour later, I walked back and showed him his cubbie. He said he didn't like it.


I'll keep you posted on how this goes.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

I Like Skinny Jeans

Started school today. Taught all of my classes. Taught them all afternoon in a row with advisory and no bathroom break. Tried new management techniques. Got so tired, I can't speak.

But, I said I would blog, and I'm blogging.

Let the record show.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Boom Goes the Dynamite

Opening day tomorrow. I'm super pumped. There were lots of students around today getting oriented, setting up their lockers, and welcoming new kids. Bring it on, kids!

When I got home I was pretty annoyed because there was a LARGE BILL from the pest management peeps. Do you know how many squirrels they removed from our attic?

EIGHT! Eight squirrels! It costs a fair bit to trap and euthanize a squirrel. It costs the same to relocate the squirrels, but I haven't noticed any particular shortage of that mangy vermin.

The good news is, all the squirrels have been caught according to the monitoring system. The screens are up and the bat door is installed. We should be bat free here in a short while. Just in time to kill the mice under the sink.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

You Never Had Much Game

Count down to the first day with students: t-minus 1.5 days. I feel mostly ready. I've got some new procedures this year, and I'm pretty psyched about busting them out. Probably no one will recognize my room because it will be so "calm and consistently productive."

That's the exact phrase I used in my syllabus. Can't lose.

I'm a little worried that the students won't like the new bell work procedure, couch procedure, quieting procedure, and homework log procedure; but I'm committing to giving these routines a good, solid try.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Never Ever Ever Ever

Today brought a series of minor misfortunes and a good finish.

First, we left in plenty of time to get to the 12:50 showing of Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days, but it turned out the highway was closed and the detours were messed up and it was raining and I drove around for an hour within a 7 mile radius of my house.

We arrived at the mall 15 minutes after the movie started and Shef was panicked that he'd missed a REALLY FUNNY PART.

So, I decided we would just hang out for two hours and watch the next one.

Then, we went in a photo booth to get our pictures taken and it broke after taking one of our dollars.

Then, I put the kids on some dumb merry-go-round, put in money (!), and it didn't go round.

By this time, we were all frustrated. Lucky for us, we found an arcade, then the food court, then this dumb mall train that charges and arm and a leg for a tour by JC Penney, then I bought the eye shadow my beauty consultant recommended for filling in my eyebrows.

Finally, the movie started and we watched it. V. Funny. We love that Wimpy Kid and his fam.

Now, we're watching iCarly on Netflix in the master bedroom.

The End.

p.s. I bought Chia Seed and Flax Seed Oil. This will probably be life changing.

Got Lost in the Game

The Pronto Pup has a super power. It's barking the most annoying piercing bark you could ever imagine in your life.

But here's the thing about the pup, regardless of his undesirable traits: he's my pup.

My mom asks me sometimes, "Are you sure Pronto is going to work out?"

And, I'm like, I'm not getting rid of MY DOG. That's how much I love him.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Identity Crisis

The other day, Mac sighed and asked to please tell him about the time I adopted him again.

"But you're not adopted," I said.

He looked at me curiously.

"Well, you know," I said. "I birthed you. Like, you grew in my tummy."

"Oh yeah!" he said.

It was like he totally remembered it. It was like it was the best time ever.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

I Said I Would Blog Every Day

And that's what I'm doing, okay?

Today was our long day of nuts and bolts meetings. Stuff like recess duty, attendance taking, and scheduling meetings.

I have reached a point of saturation. It's time to plan the lessons and welcome the children.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Wonder in Most Everything I See

This year, I moved up a floor to a new classroom with a wonderful set of windows and lots of space. Basically, I'm pumped. I had to clean out a bunch of cabinets and organize some stuff, but it was totally worth it.

Today a teacher pal walked in and told me it was all great except I clearly had to move my bookshelves.

"This spot is screaming for the bookshelves," he told me sensibly, pointing at a spot across the room from the current location of the shelves. I had to admit he's right, but at this point, I just can't move the shelves. As it is, my pal strained his own back and was limping around because he moved his classroom furniture by himself instead of asking for help, and yet he said, "I'll help you move them. I bought a dolly."

"How about I put in a maintenance request?" I suggested.

"Well," he said, "then they'll make you pack up the books, but I think we could just hoist..."

Obviously I had to stop him right there. There will be no hoisting of the shelves.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Punch It, Myrtle

Awhile ago, I wrote about the bat problem we're experiencing. Since that first bat - the one that Dan valiantly battled - we've had two more. In the living quarters. It's been hellish.

Wildlife Management has been working on this. Here's the problem, I mean besides the bats: we also have squirrels and mice. And, we can't deal with the bat problem until the squirrels stop inhabiting the attic space. So far we've trapped five squirrels, but there's still at least one more.

"Would you like the squirrels relocated or euthanized?" Scott the Wildlife Manager asked.

"Are you kidding, Scott?" I said. "Kill the suckers."

Today, he couldn't bait and reset the traps because guess what? We also have wasps.

This is getting a little bit ridiculous.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

A Little Respect

Okay, so tomorrow's the first day. It's meetings all morning. And some kind of scavenger hunt. It will probably be fun. Then, I'm going to work in my classroom. Finish some bulletin boards and make some plans. Probs catch up with some colleagues. That kind of thing.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

See a Weeping Willow

Things have gotten ridiculous. It's time to just blog every day for awhile. This is a blog, after all. Someone is supposed to write on it. Since I'm the only one with the password, I guess it has to be me.

So, I waterskied today. First and last time of the summer. At the cabin with all of Dan's family.

Shef also waterskied. He's working on dropping a ski. He did it today and stayed upright on one for many seconds.

Of course, I can already drop a ski, but it's true that I'm 34 and he's only 8.

Mac hasn't tried skiing yet, but we did take a kayak.

Mac also told me that he wished my sister in-law, Sarah, was his mom instead of me. What a load of crap. Thanks a lot kid. I mean, I'm sure she'd do a good job of it and all, but still. Love the one you're with!

Monday, August 13, 2012

I'm Dying Just To Make You See

This last weekend I finished my summer at Camp Foley. It rocked. And, I brought Shef up with me for one last weekend hurrah. Together, we stayed in one of the buildings they save for adult support staff. There's a helpful sign by the toilet in that building reminding visitors that "The Septic System cannot accept tampons and other sanitary products." I didn't really think about about it. I mean, I've seen signs like that tons of times. But, apparently Shef hasn't.

On the first afternoon, I took a pit stop and found a gross unflushed toilet.

"Shef," I said later, "why didn't you flush the toilet?"

"Mom!" he said, exasperated. "I READ the sign! I wasn't sure it accepted toilet PAPER!"

I laughed. He laughed. And then he said, "Oh, by the way, what's a tampon anyway?"

Camp is all about youth development, you know. And education. So, once again I want to thank camp for this excellent opportunity to talk to my child, this time about menstruation.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

No Escape From Reality

People, it's August 7th. I report to work in 13 days. Lucky for me, most of the readers of this blog are education professionals; otherwise, I'd get the reaction I got from Dan that one time when I told him there were "ONLY three and-a-half weeks left of summer."

Yesterday, I secured some childcare (can you say, "Glee Musical Theater Camp"?) and planned to seriously get down to business. This means the end of novel-reading for the summer.

But first, I wanted to say I read one of my favorite novels of all time last week: State of Wonder by Ann Patchett. I think it's time to face the reality that Ann Patchett is one of my very favorite writers. That gal can really tell a good story.

Now, I'm reading a bunch of school books. My goals this year are related to classroom management and procedures. Right now I'm reading Teach Like a Champion. Some of the stuff in that book seems a little military extreme to me, but some of it seems okay. Some of it is good reminders. In any case, it can't hurt to read the book.

Thursday, August 2, 2012


I'm fresh off a two-day training in Challenge-Based Learning. The workshop was wicked intense. Teams had to produce video in two hours this morning. Then, in an hour, we had to finalize plans for rolling out a school-wide CBL project.

We did some good thinking, and it was fantastic to clear out the summer cobwebs. I admit to a moment of panic when, at the start of the first day, we had to say our names, what we teach, and "our passions."

My passions?!

Do you know what I've been doing all summer?

Driving to swimming lessons, driving to tennis lessons, driving to violin lessons, organizing play dates, coaching preschool soccer, and working at camp to cover Shef's tuition.

Am I supposed to have, like, outside interests at this point?

It was a relief to find the other moms of young kids in the exact same position.