Sunday, January 28, 2007


So, when I apologized to the fourth hour class, they laughed at me and told me that although I thought of myself as highly intimidating, I was really more like a “chipmunk standing up there.”

“I see,” I said, coolly. Then they tried to make me laugh by telling me they'd skipped their ADD medication again and making bizarre noises. This is their way of making up.

Last night I took Shef to the JV hockey game, which many of them played in, and a few made a special effort to wave at him. This was a huge thrill for the almost-three-year-old, so I suppose I’m grateful.

In other news, I am now officially a faster half-marathoner than I was when I was thirteen-years-old. By a whopping 75 seconds over 13.1 miles. Wahoo.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Committed to the Triathlon Lifestyle

As you may know, I’ve been committed to finding time for four workouts a week this school year. I think it’s been good for my stress and weight levels. I’ve never really been able to maintain fitness throughout the school year, mostly because in the past, I’ve been an exercise snob and perfectionist. Unless I was training for a Boston-qualifying marathon, it didn’t seem worth it to me to stay in shape.

I’m happy to report that I’m no longer that way. I no longer feel that I have to exercise for a certain amount of time to make it “worthwhile.” I no longer think I have to do things at a certain pace to see benefits.

And perhaps unfortunately for some, I no longer think it’s necessary to have a swimsuit that fully conceals my backside in order to do a few laps. After I got out of the pool today, I realized my Speedo was billowing around my stomach and the mole on my left butt cheek was clearly discernible through the “fabric” on the seat. I knew the suit was on its last legs, but I think it just sort of disintegrated.

Oh well. I guess seeing my ass is the price the rest of the Y patrons must pay for my well-being. I'm totally fine with that.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

On Second Thought

Oh, really who wants to hear about people yelling things like: "Do you know what it's like to have ADD?" without an appointment first thing in the morning and being stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic and having your iPod break and your computer be disconnected from your LCD projector.

So, here's a cute picture of Shef learning to ski:

Props to Dobby for the killer photo.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

My Next Post Will Be About How Bad My Day Was. We Can All Look Forward to That.

Shef has begun quoting his books and movies in apt situations. For instance, I came to his room the other night, exasperated by the fact that he’d been calling out for me for over an hour, and he looked at me, dejected.

“What’s wrong,” I demanded.

“She loves me not,” he explained, his lower lip protruding.

Flash-forward a couple of days, to when Dan was reprimanding me for burning out light bulbs too fast. I explained that the lights were burned out because I’d left them on overnight when I was home alone with my child while my husband lived in Iowa.

“Mommy, I’m afraid,” Shef interrupted.

“Of what?”

“Of the ringing bells of Santa’s sleigh.”

Of course.

And then yesterday, as we left Dan’s parents’ and discovered that a few inches of snow had fallen during dinner, Shef exclaimed: “The world is covered with a sparkling blanket.” I thought that was charming plagiarism if I’d ever heard it.

I’m pretty sure he wasn’t quoting any book or movie I’ve ever shown him, however, when he looked the tech who was set to x-ray his tonsils and adenoids in the eye and announced, “Now, we’re not going to cut my penis.”

No. No, we’re not.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

My Ability to Write Diminishes With Each Consecutive Day of Single Parenting

I guess it's maybe because Dan's gone that's Shef's been working on his softer self this week. He's forgone fort-building and football practice for primping and talking about his feelings.

Last Friday, I missed a call from one of Shef’s teachers asking if she could paint his finger nails. He was really into the polish and bummed that he couldn’t get it done, so I slicked some red on him on Monday.

On Tuesday, we spent a half hour in Barnes and Noble reading books about Cinderella and Snow White. "Cinderella doesn't like her step mother, but she likes the prince," he reminded me.

Then, today at Target, Shef chose princess Pull-Ups over his usual Cars-emblazoned ones. When I put one on him at bedtime, he did a little happy dance, shaking his flower-covered butt all over the bathroom.

Finally, his grandma brought his new fish over. He got the fish for Christmas, but we went out of town right afterwards, so she had agreed to babysit. “I just want to be alone with my fish,” he announced, after feeding it and examining it for awhile.

I'm totally fine with all this stuff. I'm curious to see if he reverts to his boyishness over the weekend, when Dan makes his 24-hour appearance.

Sunday, January 7, 2007

I'm Feeling Wistful and Contemplative

Well, the last hours of winter break are upon me. I had a really great vacation. I did almost no work (this will, of course, cause me pain in the coming weeks, but it’s pain I would’ve felt anyway), I visited the desert, and I did a lot of training for my half marathon. Oh, and also I registered for my thesis credits. This means that I’ll be finishing My Stupid Master’s Degree™ come heck or high water by May. I’m already planning the party.

Shef got great Christmas presents, became obsessed with all things Cars, and had his first day on downhill skis yesterday, thanks to his superstar grandfather.

Dan is back in Des Moines, for the fourth work-week in a row. I have developed systems for coping as a single parent, but it’s not exactly easy. The worst is the break-of-dawn drop off at daycare.

But anyway, here we go.

Friday, January 5, 2007

The Vacation

If you must travel with a toddler, I've found that the portable dvd player is indispensible.

Of course the portable dvd player and the first class fruit plate is really the best.