Friday, March 25, 2016

Professional 37 Critic

As you may know, I turned 38 years old this week.  I'll now review my 38th year.  That was last year.  It seems like it should have been my 37th year, but after thinking about it carefully for at least 60 seconds, I've deterimned it was my 38th.

In any case, the year has been momentous for many reasons.  First, we introduced Teddy Bridgewater the Goldendoodle to our family.  I'm pretty much the only one who loves Teddy here, but that's okay.  He's my dog.  He's exuberant and filled with potential.  We've had a set-back in the last couple of days in that I decided to skimp on my chew budget and fed him sub-par rawhide sticks from Target.  Explosive diarrhea ensued, and I now have an occasion to professionally review a cleaning product called "Anti-Icky Poo" by MisterMax.  I'm giving it 5 of 5 stars.

More momentousness came in the form of my long-lost siblings Rachel and Noah who are now no longer lost, but are rather on speed dial.  It's a miracle.  I give them both 5 of 5 stars.

A final momentous moment is now.  I'm on a family trip to Chicago with my sister Mary and my two wonderful and amazing children. All three of my companions earn 5 of 5 stars.  The drive was utterly splendiferous with sunshine and blue skies and peaceful riders who refrained from arguing for a full seven hours.  Our Chicago-style pizza featured mild sausage and a buttery crust.  The pool delighted my younger companions, and Mary and I only got in minimal trouble for sipping Chardonnay on the deck. The trip is 5 of 5 so far, and I expect this to continue.


mm said...

Happy Birthday!!

Unknown said...

I give you 5 of 5, too!

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday!!! I always enjoy reading your blog posts. You are hilarious and very smart. Enjoy the rest of your time in Chicago, my dear! xoxo